Audit THIS!

Has anyone ever gotten a letter like this? What a joy to find it in the mail!


Dear Taxpayer,

You were recently notified that you needed to submit your income information and tax returns for years 1998 through 2003. Because you failed to comply within thirty (30) days from the original notice, you are hearby informed that this matter will be forwarded to the City of Toledo Police Department in ten (10) days to issue a subpoena against you. If you do not satisfy this obligation by May 16, 2005, a subpoena will then be served at your home by a Toledo police officer. Failure to comply subjects you to criminal prosecution and/or civil litigation as specified by the provisions of Ohio Revised Code Chapter 718 and Toledo Municipal Code Chapter 1905.

All Toledo residents are required to pay 2.25% in local taxes on all wages earned, reguardless of where the work is performed. If your employer withholds and remits local income tax to another city, you will recieve credit for the amount withheld.

Should you have any questions, contact me at XXX-XXX-XXXX between the hours of 7:30am and 4:15pm, Monday through Friday.

Della

I am a potential criminal. I don't see how I couldn't have more friends due to my increase in society status. A hardened criminal at the age of 17, only to be revisited by it eight years later.

No wonder this haircut suits me to a T!